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My Own Friend bitch
Author:wetls
I had a friend going on 12 years; we were best of friends, let’s call her "B". I was recently married to my man of 6 years. "B" said she would help with the wedding and was so happy for the both of us. My wedding was nearing and she had said she wanted to organise my hens night for me. "B" advised me that it was getting a bit late so she wouldn't be able to organise it. My sister took over and organised a great night out with a boat load of strippers in Sydney. I asked my sis that she please include "B" so as not to cause any grief. "B" made the veil for the night (the veil was great). My sister organised an afternoon tea before the stripper boat, so that the people that weren't coming could celebrate with me. "B" advised me that she didn't really feel like having the afternoon tea and she hates catching the train, plus she would really rather go and show her new car to a friend in Sydney. This friend is someone that "B" constantly bitches and whinges about. She also invited her along to the stripper night because she felt bad coming without her. My sister decided that I had enough on my plate with organising the wedding and looking after my 2 children. She told "B" that she wasn't being a very good friend and she is just being a bitch. "B" replied that it wasn't that at all she really just couldn't make it to the afternoon tea because she couldn't afford to buy me a hens present. ("B" and I have had an agreement with each other for 3 years that we won't give presents for our kids or ourselves as it was getting to expensive). My sister said what a crock of shit. (I wasn't present for this exchange of words). "B" called me later and asked if I wanted her at the afternoon tea. I said "of course I do of all the people I would want there it would be you." She said why didn't you tell me. I told her I had already said I would love to have her there but I am not going to guilt her into doing something she doesn’t want to do. She said I would have told you off for it. I said "I am not you, I don't do that I would rather you came because you wanted to not because I forced you. She decided she would come but leave early to drive to Sydney so that she didn't have to get the train and so that her other friend wouldn't feel left out and to show off her car. We had a great time on the train all us girls with a couple of drinks. "B" wasn't really missed. When we arrived we had a great night and "B" sat beside me which made her friend get a bit annoyed, but hey it was my night. We were getting off the boat after watching the strippers and we were looking around for "B" and her friend. 15 minutes later we still couldn't find them and "B" wasn't answering her phone. We decided to just go to the planned club for afterwards we couldn't wait around all night. We found "B" she was already in the club. "B" pretty much ignored me for the rest of the night and kept disappearing. We decided we would leave it was around 12:30am and we still had to catch the train home. "B" was no-where to be found. We messaged we were going. She messaged back, where are you? We messaged going to Macca's before we leave catch us there. We were at Macca's for 45 min, we had no response and she never turned up. The next day she said she never received our message about McDonalds. I found out later she was at Kings Cross which is why we couldn't find her. My wedding day was coming up. I was finding it harder and harder to talk to her she had already told me that my wedding was costing her a fortune, a new dress for her, a new suit for her man, a present for me, I was feeling really let down by my so called best friend who promised to be there for me. I asked her to help me on the day to do my hair and help me get dressed. I did this for her on her wedding day. I think it is a special thing that you share with your close friends. "B" said she was sorry but wouldn't be able to be there to help as she didn't want her new boyfriend of 6 months to arrive on his own to the wedding. She said she would prefer it if she was just a guest. I said that’s fine, once again I am not going to force someone to do something they quite clearly don't want to do. My wedding day was beautiful I didn't have a wedding party it was just my man and me up the front even our kids weren't in it. I didn't call my friend "B" after that she rang me, she came to visit me. She eventually asked what was up with me. I have a motto in my life which is; if you don't want to know, don't ask. You will always get an extremely straight forward answer that leaves nothing in its wake. I said to her do you really want to know?? She said go for it. I said ok, Your Selfish. She said “Really? I think I am very generous. I said to her Hun there are 2 kinds of selfish one where you give things and the other is where you give of yourself. You give things quite a lot but you don't give of yourself. She said your right I guess I was just pissed off you didn't have me in your wedding party. I couldn't believe that it had all come down to this, that a friend of 12 years we have had children together, I helped her through her divorce to her husband who left her whilst pregnant with their 3rd child. It rocked me to my core. But all in all she said she was sorry and that she had been selfish and could I forgive her. I replied yes I can I'm sorry you weren't in the wedding party but we had decided to have it just him and I. She knew all the reasons already. The next day in the afternoon I received an SMS saying that she was really hurt by the things I had said to her. I replied by saying "B" don't you think that if you had never treated me that way I would never have said those things. She replied by text saying obviously I had always felt that way and she didn't think she could be friends with someone like that. I never replied. It is only now that I am no longer friends with her that I realise how she affected my life with her negativity. There are a lot more stories of the things she has done to me over the years but this one topped it all off. I find I don't second guess myself anymore. I am more confident. I wear clothes that I look fantastic in but she would have said made me look old or whatever negative thing she could have grasped at. I am happier in my relationship now than I ever have been because I don't have her in my ear criticising little things about my man that made me love him not dislike him. I have eradicated a parasite that has been attached to me and it is the most free-ing thing I have ever done in my life.
19 December, 2007
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