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Nanny bitch
Author:motherdiaries
I swear that this is a true story. I had a part time nanny, let’s call her ‘Cheryl’. She was about 25 years old and the nicest girl possible. She looked after my kids really well and I would say she was genuinely a a caring person. That’s why I didn’t complain to her face. The problem was she was eating me out of house and home. My grocery bill sky rocketed, as did her weight. I work all day, so I am not sure if she was eating it or stealing it to take home to eat later. I really do think she was eating it. I came home in the middle of the afternoon one day and Cheryl was cooking macaronic cheese, a hamburger (using the mince I was going to use for tea), a sponge cake and whipping cream. What’s wrong with that? Well, firstly, the kids had already eaten; secondly they were having an afternoon nap and thirdly, they are 3 and 4 years old respectively. All the softdrink was gone. All the biscuits were gone. As Cheryl had to start work at 8.00am in the morning (I have to get to work) she often had breakfast with the kids. One morning I overslept the alarm clock so I was putting on my makeup whilst Cheryl was busy cooking breakfast for herself and the kids. She cracked 6 eggs in a bowl and proceeded to make french toast….and some rashers of bacon ….and some thinly sliced potatoes……..and some hollandaise sauce. My kids are as thin as whips. That night I went through the garbage bin to see what she had thrown out that she couldn’t eat…..Nothing…just empty wrappers. I started getting really annoyed at the pots and pans and general kitchen paraphenlia being left out in the kitchen because as I have to cook dinner and it takes me 15 minutes to wipe up Cheryl’s dishes and put things away before I can even start making dinner. Also, I didn’t appreciate all the milk being used up, or the sugar or cereal or eggs or butter. I got more annoyed with Cheryl when I took her and another part time girl out for a birthday lunch and there was a ‘lunch special’ which included 2 courses and a glass of wine. Cheryl ordered ‘a la carte’ and had 3 courses and her meal was more than mine and the other girls’ put together! The final draw came when Cheryl wrote out her own shopping list of things for me to get….and told me she had broken my food processor. I asked her if she was ‘eating for two’ because I had no idea why she was eating everything. She burst out crying and quit. Now I ask nannies what they have for lunch and I do not allow them to have breakfast a my house….I ask them to replace the milk if they have used the last of it and I never ever shout them out for a meal. Fat nannies a) can’t push a pram down the road b) can’t pick up a crying toddler because they can’t bend c) break a sweat at any temperature above 25 degrees celsius d) look like they are having a heart attack when you ask them to hang some washing on the washing line. e) They won’t take the kids to a public pool because it is too hot and they are sweating at 25 degrees anyway and they don’t want to get out of their clothes because they are scared kids are going to shriek ‘fat girl’ ….and f) they eat ALL the time.
14 September, 2007
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